so soon

i think the worst is that
i havent talked to her in so long
or that i very well possibly will never say
another word to her again

when i think of that
that usually makes me cry or something

to be honest
i would just keep saying goodbye
just so that i would be able to keep talking
even though that would be the last thing
i would ever want to say

i think im hurt in a way
that i dont think i couldve ever imagined
i could do to myself

and i don't think i could ever understand
and i dont think i could ever be the same

i just want these razor sharp pains
to miss me and hit the walls
fall down harmlessly
and even just disappear

"sometimes i can't believe it/
i'm movin' past the feeling"

or something
always "or something"
i don't know